Not In Portland: A Very Special Episode of LOSTBlog

Hey Losties,

As I believe I mentioned in a previous post, I will be away from civilization this coming week, so I will not be able to watch the new episode of LOST on time, and therefore will not be posting about it on time, either. I am going to make every attempt to watch while I'm there, but where I'm going, communications are not always reliable; I will probably post sometime on Friday.


So, where am I going?

By the time you will likely read this, I will be depending on others for my survival. I will need to rely on those who have already settled this place for food and shelter. The journey there is long and potentially arduous (because I'll be on a bus full of sixth grade boys), and it's beneficial to simply sleep through the trip (orange juice optional, though there are usually bagels in the main office at school before we leave). People will be moving through the dense forest at night, where strange sounds will be heard. Groups and alliances will be formed. Our fates will be uncertain. And if we don't live together, we're going to die alone. (Not really.)

Sound familiar?

(Cue Charlie Pace:) "Guys...where are we?"

Colebrook, CT is the home of a YMCA camp where, once a year, Chalk Hill School sixth-graders and their chaperones attend "Nature's Classroom." It's four days and three nights of activities and classes where the students learn a little something about the outdoors.....and themselves. (You knew that was coming.) It's a fantastic experience for all of them; for many, it's their first time away from home, and it's certainly the first time that they do many of the activities, such as candle-making, shark dissecting, caring for llamas, edible plants in the forest, walking in the woods at night, and so many others. There is even an Underground Railroad simulation where, yes, the children become slaves (though aren't they already? ; )  ) which makes quite an impression on most students. Oh, and they get to sing "Daddy Shark," too, but that's another story. 
My role there is as a chaperone, which includes living in a cabin with 20 sixth-grade boys; monitoring various places around the camp, such as the zoo, Boulder Basin, and the giant slide; and for most of the time, hanging out with my fellow chaperones as we eat the food confiscated from students (they're not allowed to bring food with them, so we can always depend on them having some), sit by the fireplace, nap on the couches, and chill the eff out. How does any of this help them on the Connecticut Mastery Tests? It doesn't, which is why it's the greatest thing that happens in sixth grade.

But I don't tell you all of this just so you know where I, DharmaTeacher, am all week. You see, while I'll be playing the teacher role there, there is also an element of Dharma afoot at NC. It's very subtle, but I believe there is a conspiracy at work, and that NC is the reason why I'm obsessed with LOST, why the DI always felt a little familiar, and why being at NC feels like some sort of twisted psychological and spiritual experiment. 

Allow me to present to you the photographic evidence for Nature's Classroom as a Dharma Initiative outpost. Judge for yourself.

 

Here's the Nature's Classroom logo. Simple and symbolic. 

Sort of like...

...this!

 Notice the octagonal shape of the Dharma logo above. Now look at the shape of this wing of the Senior Lodge cabin below.

Coincidence?!

A map of the Island.

A map of NC. 

Whoah! Almost exactly the same!

This is a typical cabin at NC.

This is the NC Arts & Crafts building.

Look familiar?

Will there be no end to the conspiracy?!?!

 Here's a typical bathroom in the NC cabins. Notice the bar light.

You know who else has bar lights in their bathrooms?

The Dharma Initiative!

This is the NC dining hall. Pay attention to the pattern of the windows in the front of the building. And know that that small room that extends off the left side of the building in the photo above is a greenhouse. But remember that the main purpose of this building is not as a greenhouse....

 ...just like THIS building - The Orchid Station!

Here's the lake at NC. (Pay no attention to the ice and snow.)

Canoes. A small dock. Hmm, where have we seen all of THAT before?

That's RIGHT!

Conspiracy!

"Oh, but I bet they don't have picnic tables at NC and the Dharma barracks," I hear you smugly saying.

NOW what do you have to say for yourself? 

(How do you think we defend ourselves from the guinea hens that roam menacingly around the camp?)

You want lamp posts?

You got lamp posts.

This is hard, indisputable evidence, people! How can you deny the connection?!?!

DI? NC? 

Two letters!!!!!

I will leave you with this picture of the forests of Nature's Classroom, which of course are just like the jungles of the Island. (Doesn't it seem like "the light doesn't fall quite right" in this picture?) 

So if you hear of a fleet of coach buses disappearing from the face of Route 8 (8! It's one of the numbers!) this week, you'll know where to look. All I ask is that you find a multi-billionaire industrialist, convince him to finance an expedition to Colebrook, CT, and be sure to bring a sonic fence. And a guy that can read dead peoples' thoughts. 

Just don't bring Keamy, okay?


Enjoy this week's episode, and you'll hear from me at the end of the week.


Good Luck (and wish me luck) & Namaste,


~ Matt